I miss Lakota. I mean I know Missoula and Lakota are the same place, but I miss how Missoula used to be. I miss the times when Lakota would advertise £1.25 drinks on student night, and actually serve £1.25 drinks on student night. I miss when it was free to get in before 11. I miss when I was one of the youngest in there, and I didn't have to ask for ID before I pulled some lad. I also miss when Wednesday nights were relatively quiet. I mean quiet in that you could move around without getting pushed over. Missoula have sold themselves out in my opinion. They've got too big for their boots. This massive increase in popularity (I mean kudos to whoever does the branding and marketing though) means that they've become obsessed with money. They cram as many people in and charge them Saturday night prices. And that's not what Wednesday nights are about.
Last Wednesday was possibly the worst experience I have ever had in there (aside from the time I got so drunk, I was sick on my feet). Firstly, I feel like we were forced to sacrifice our pre-drinks in Spoons so we would get there early. I mean we weren't physically forced sacrifice Spoons - no one held a knife to our throats - but the queue for Missoula has become ridiculous. Nobody wants to queue for an hour to get in, especially in December. And especially not in front on the window to a nice warm restaurant, where you can see all the diners taunting you with their lovely food. I aways feel like someone's looking at me going 'look at you, you dirty slut, standing outside in the cold while we have a nice civilised dinner in the warmth'. I hate that window. Secondly we had to pay a fiver to get in. And I heard rumours it went up to £10 after midnight or something. If Missoula let 1000 people in (and I'm sure their capacity is more than that), then they made £5,000-£10-000 ON THE DOOR ALONE. And that is a disgustingly large amount of money. Anyway, by the time I got in, I was too sober to be foolish enough to pay £3.50 for a bottle of bitch piss (you know, VK, or WKD. The stuff that's 90% sugar and you wouldn't actually be caught dead drinking if you were outside the club and over the age of 12). I know its not the same for everyone, but they would have made like £20 out of me, if the drinks had been on offer. But they weren't. So they didn't make any money out of me at all once I was inside. I also had a massive problem with the ladies toilets (as my twitter feed bears witness too if you look at my tweets from that night). It's not just in Missoula, it's more a critique of everywhere, but the fucking patriarchy never, ever put enough female toilets in anywhere, and there is consequently always a twenty minute queue for a wee. And do you not what really annoys me, I HAVE NEVER SEEN A QUEUE OUTSIDE THE MENS! There needs to be more women's toilets. Once you're in the toilets though the story gets worse, there's usually sick on the floor (or my leg. cough you know who you are and I hope you're proud cough) and there is never any loo roll! Just because men can shake it dry, doesn't mean women can too. Nobody wants to wee and then have to pull their knickers up without wiping. Wet knickers are not cool. They're uncomfortable, and I'm sure you can get thrush or some other horrible fungal infection from damp conditions. I was also pretty pissed off that it was like being in a scrum every time you wanted to get outside to breath some nice clean air that wasn't saturated in others peoples sweat. Once you got out safe and alive though, there were so many people and such little space, that it was inevitable that some prepubescent boy, puffing on a Marlborough to impress the 'birds', would stick his cigarette through your lovely new tights/dress/top. Grrr.....
So to conclude. I had a shit time. I wouldn't have had a shit time if Missoula was still Lakota, and they hadn't let all the children of Chelmsford in and had only charged me 'student' prices. Basically, at times like these I wish Chelmsford was a little more like York, with selective door policies, and dirt cheap drinks that encourage the binge drinking culture I'm used too. (I'll still be hitting up Missoula this Wednesday though...)
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